I would like to welcome you to For God, Fore His Glory, and invite you to join me on the road to Emmaus. Of course, this is a spiritual journey but one uniquely designed with you in mind. It doesn’t matter what road you are walking the Lord will accompany you. Information has been made available for you to read and determine what is of interest and applies to you. This information is not meant to overwhelm; quite the opposite, it is meant to enlighten and empower as it has done for me.
My purpose for sharing has a threefold intent: (1) That God’s love would radically impact lives, (2) That eyes and ears, hearts and hands would open so ALL that God desires to personally bestow would be received, and (3) That knowing God and His Word and His loving-kindness would result in negativity just naturally losing ground/control in our lives because strongholds would be broken by the resurrection power of the Spirit of the Lord.
It makes no difference who you are, what your personal beliefs or where you call home we are all functioning in some fashion in the error deception causes. And of course, if we knew we’ve been deceived then it wouldn’t be deception. With this in mind, there is no way we could possess the “IN-TO-ME-SEE” knowledge that only the Spirit of Truth can reveal about ourselves and God and our human condition. There are so many things to learn like feelings and beliefs are not facts. Please don’t let offense sway you, for what is generated by offense: Discomfort, upset, anger, insult, sin, shame, disapproval…rises from deep within us and works against us.
My heart’s desire is to share knowledge of God and His Word, Christ Jesus, so you too can find rest for your soul. Our thoughts, feelings, attitudes, behaviors and beliefs have been affected by negativity – Fear, pride, anger, rejection, rebellion, bitterness…the list is long and can prove debilitating.
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Revelation 12:11 says, “We overcome the forces of evil by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of our testimony.” Now a testimony can offer encouragement and hope, but it cannot provide what’s absolutely essential a profound personal impact. Nor can a personal impact bring about lasting change, for that can only be accredited to a miraculous metamorphosis: Spiritual Transformation. For the Lord has surely said:
“Not by might nor by power, but by My Spirit.”
Zechariah 4:7
If anger, fear, unforgiveness, resentment…are present, then true compassion, kindness, respect…for self and others will in some measure be lacking. This life-changing transformation is not about plastic surgery or weight loss. Outward appearance is what people look at, but God sees the appearance of our heart (1 Samuel 16:7).
We possess a very special knack for making what is wrong seem right. Not before, not during but afterwards, when the heat of onus (reproach, admonishment) occurs, the heart responds though the flushing of shame and guilt and embarrassment may not. How the heart manipulates thought and feeling to do what it desires. But, what can’t be manipulated; instead, only obscured by denying, rationalizing, justifying, comparisons…the crimson stains sin places on our soul.
A life-changing transformation is accomplished when God and His Word and Holy Spirit recreate (restore, renew, revive) our spiritual being! Their work won’t be seen or felt it will become evident when we’re thinking, behaving, believing somewhat differently.
FINE – Favorable, Illuminating, Noteworthy, Effectual
Adjustments are made, for God imparts spiritual gifts – Faith, truth, wisdom, knowledge, prophecy, healing, counsel, fear of the Lord, joy, peace, discernment of spirits….Gifts that change us from the inside out so we can: Arise and shine when heaven’s Light comes and the glory of the Lord rises upon us (Isaiah 60:1).
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How can what injures so personally be overcome if a different perspective cannot be viewed? Paul explains this better than I can: I don’t really understand myself, for I want to do what is right, but I don’t do it. I don’t want to do what is wrong, but I do it anyway. I have discovered this principle of life – That when I want to do what is right, I inevitably do what is wrong (Romans 7:15,19,21). Now there are so many who have been abused unjustly, and I’m sorry. You did nothing to do deserve such mistreatment.
But, there are answers. There is hope. What has holistic harmful effects – Anger, unforgiveness, bitterness, hatred…from the bondage of such powerful forces we can be released. Psalm 146:3-5 says: Blessed are those who seek God’s help, whose hope and trust is in the Lord their God. Why? No mortal man can save, when their spirit departs, they return to the ground. On that very day their plans come to nothing. But a child of God will overcome them, because the One Who is in them, Holy Spirit, is greater than the one who is in the world (1 John 4:4).
God’s plan, His purpose spans throughout time and eternity! There is much to discuss with this being the motivator – Knowledge is power. A power we need because there is much that comes against us. And though you may not be very familiar with the Lord, Jesus Christ, God’s Word will strengthen you (Isaiah 45:5-7). So you too can hear Him say, “Friend, move up to a better place,” (Luke 14:10). So you too can be among those who come to know Him with a deep, instinctive, personal affection as for a close friend (John 21:17 Amp).
Truly, we could all use such a Friend who is faithful, and works to strengthen and protect us not only from the evil one so we won’t be outwitted, but also as I have learned despite ourselves, for we’re unaware of the devil’s schemes (2 Corinthians 2:11). Jesus is a friend we can have confidence in. Acts 10:38 tells us Jesus of Nazareth went around doing good and healing ALL who were under the power of the devil because God was with Him. God anointed Jesus with the power of Holy Spirit. He offered the kindness of a friend to everyone.
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God has given us His Word, and Jesus has revealed His Father’s great compassion for mankind. The problem, which is made quite apparent just by turning on the news, knowledge of Gods’ loving-kindness may be lacking for all sorts of reasons: but, what’s absent is personal experience, and this is what this journey offers.
How can we come to know the One Who directs our heart into God’s love and His perseverance (2 Thessalonians 3:3)? How would we come to believe it is the hand of God that sustains us (Psalm 89:21)? How can we pass through those gates to walk the Way God has prepared and chosen for the people (Isaiah 62:10) without knowing the thoughts and feelings the Word of Truth, Christ Jesus, shares?
If you invest in this precious commodity God has given us – Time, then most definitely interest will grow! Come along! Embark on a personal journey on the road to Emmaus, which means a warm spring and mule. Luke 24:13 tells of two men who had left Jerusalem, which includes this meaning: To flow as water, to point out, to teach, which was about seven miles from their destination – Emmaus.
Along the way they were discussing everything that had happened that day. As they talked and discussed these things with each other, Jesus Himself came up and walked with them; but they were kept from recognizing Him. When asked what they were discussing, they stood still, their faces downcast and said: “Do you not know the things that have happened these days in Jerusalem?”
“About Jesus of Nazareth, He was a prophet, powerful in word and deed before God and all the people. He was crucified. We had hoped He was the One Who was going to redeem Israel. In addition, some of our women amazed us. They went to the tomb early this morning, but didn’t find His body. They came and told us that they had seen a vision of angels, who said Jesus was alive. Some of our companions went to the tomb, and found it was just as the women had said, they did not see Him.”
The Man walking with them said, “How foolish you are, and how slow of heart to believe all that the prophets have spoken! Did not the Christ have to suffer these things and then enter His glory?” Then, beginning with Moses and all the Prophets, He explained to them what was said in all the Scriptures concerning Himself.
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They strongly urged the stranger to stay with them for the day was almost over, so He went in to stay with them. The Man sat with them at the table, took bread, gave thanks, broke it and began to give it to them, when their eyes were opened and they recognized Jesus, Who disappeared from their sight. They asked each other: “Were not our hearts burning within us while He talked to us on the road and opened the Scriptures to us?” They got up and returned to Jerusalem to find the eleven and those with them saying: “It is true! The Lord has risen and has appeared to Simon?”
While they were still talking about this, Jesus Himself stood among them and said:
“Peace be with you!”
This is what God wants us to have peace of mind and heart, which His Word freely bestows. Jesus appeared to the one who denied Him not once but three times – Peter. How many times have we behaved in ways that have caused us to feel ashamed? All that is said about this time Jesus spent with Peter is exactly what those men said: It is true the Lord has appeared to Simon. Why? We each need His personal attention. We desperately need His individual and compassionate care. Anger, denial, rejection in words cannot prevent Jesus from coming to us. It’s a heart filled with anger and deception and wantonness that places distance between the Lord and ourselves.
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Jesus may be a complete stranger to you, or He may be as those two men thought a Prophet, but it wasn’t until they became familiar with God’s Word that Truth was able to emerge and Christ, the Anointed One, was truly recognized.
Time flows like a spring of water, but a mule can’t be led to drink. And, like sands through an hourglass, so are the days of our lives. We can’t change the past or what tomorrow will bring, but we don’t have to be stuck or stymied by stubbornness or rejection or fear.
Jesus invites us to walk with Him in miraculous realms. This may stir your spirit, but there is much about us that robs us of experiencing its reality. Quite possibly there’s a mountain of obstacles that must be moved, but God is the only one who can help us overcome our ordinary life perspectives so extraordinary accomplishments can be realized and achieved.
Only God can accomplish what is impossible for us; and, this is the mission He sets us on – Renewal (Inner Healing) and Recovery, and there is so much to discover. For God has designed a process that promises transformation will just naturally occur:
ASK SEEK KNOCK
For this is God’s promise, ask it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; those who seek shall find; and to those who knock, the door will be opened (Matthew 7:7-8).
Know, there are multitudes, multitudes in the valley of decision (Joel 3:14) so I ask what is your decision? Are you willing to seek a friendship with Jesus? In Isaiah 26:7 the Message Bible identified the Lord as the Leveler, Who stops us at the crossroads so we can look around
(Jeremiah 6:16), and give thought. Consider well your decision, to develop a friendship with the One Whose righteousness levels and evens a path in this fallen world with Truth and Grace so we can linger, for it is sign-posted with His decisions (Isaiah 26:7 The Message).
Praise God! The Lord desires to show you a more excellent way!
1 Corinthians 12:31
God’s Word reveals the One, Who offers Peace instead of confusion; Truth instead of our patterns of denial; Understanding instead of ignorance; Wisdom instead of foolishness; Righteousness instead of error; the Way to an abundant Life. Where fear is overcome by Love, for God is love! And His desire is to fill us with His Word so we not only come to know, but receive all the benefits that result from knowing the only One Who is Good (Matthew 19:17). For we are surely very familiar with the drawbacks and disadvantages of knowing evil!
The information I share has not been gained by just reading books, though the knowledge I received from them was essential. I also share what is based on experience. A lifetime of experiences has been woven together by the only One who could accomplish such a miraculous life-changing feat – Supplanting (usurping, displacing, cutting out) fear with Love and Power and the Soundness of Mind that God’s Word of Truth bestows.
Our will, our words, our emotions are powerful for how we think and feel generates action. However, what cannot be disputed there are only ever two choices: Good or Evil, Life or Death, Peace or Discord, Right or Wrong…and two wrongs will never make things right. And, unfortunately our heart and the ways of this world keep us bound to self-interest, and many lessons are being learned the hard way.
If there was interest in the image God created us to be, then it would be possible for the likeness of the Lord to be seen. For then, we’d better understand how our prideful nature really does set us up for failure. For the first Adam became for us a living soul; however, the second Adam, Christ Jesus, became for us a Life-Giving Spirit (1 Corinthians 15:45).
So much interest has been invested in the standards of this world, and as a result, moral and ethical, social and work-related decorum (civility, correctness) is not only being trampled, the techniques-of-deceptions are readily being used. Yes, the white-washing of denial: Rationalizing, justifying, minimizing, accusing, blaming, excusing… is being applied in attempts to cover wrong-doing. Prayer was removed from schools and metal detectors are being installed. What is being gained? What is being lost? What really matters?
OUR SPIRITUAL LIVES MATTER!
Every person born on earth is automatically enrolled in the world’s school of hard knocks. However, a choice must be made to enroll in Holy Spirit’s Academy “Transformational Life.” Jesus shows Love and saves – Not by bow, sword or battle by horses and soldiers, but by the Lord God (Hosea 1:7), by the power and authority of God’s Word. He brings us victory over any enemy (anger, addiction, fear, shame, guilt, hatred, offense, bitterness, resentment, unforgiveness…)! He will put these adversaries of ours to shame (Psalm 44:6).
Along with Knowledge, Understanding and Insight, Holy Spirit gives us everything we may need to overcome and rise above those things that come against us. No matter our circumstances and whatever our differences God’s Word will always help us.
A banner has been set up for those who fear and worshipfully revere God; a standard displayed because of the Truth (Psalm 60:4). Twenty-five lessons are being offered that to date have evolved from a 30-year process of growing and gaining knowledge of God’s Word of Truth, Christ Jesus. During those early years, my mouth was filled with empty talk since insight and discernment were simply not a concern. Too much time was devoted to earning approval, seeking acceptance and validation in order to feel valued, in order to feel loved.
Countless attempts were made to protect and defend against all the regrets, disappointments and failures of my yesterdays, while at the same time being hindered even, impeded by the fear I projected into my tomorrows. Working to earn the love and respect of others; however, going about it with character deficits and learned behaviors that caused people to be put off. Unable to recognize the Truth of our human condition, so surely not realizing how flawed my efforts and how unrealistic my expectations.
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I was being frightened and made off-balanced by my own doings: Critical, disrespectful, judgmental and self-righteous opinions and attitudes that absolutely affected, while also infecting my soul, my spirit, my way of thinking with diseases such as codependency, people-pleasing, the confusion and fear and deep-rooted anger that emotional traumas generate.
So much fear and confusion amassed since childhood wanting to please and be accepted, to be valued and loved. Trying to cope; yet, deluged over and over by the uncertainties of life. How difficult to remain even-keeled when feelings specific to self-interest are unpredictable and fragile, and so easily injured by the teeter-tottering of emotion.
I was made aware of God’s process for transformation while going through the upset and emotional trauma adversity causes. I would not wish such adversity on anyone, but I have personally experienced, like so many of us have, the turmoil and pain that stubbornness and trusting my ways were actually better causes.
Hurting people hurt people intentionally and not so intentionally, we still get hurt. There’s an insanity involved in all of this when we’re doing the same things over and over yet expecting, hoping, praying for a different result. God can’t snap His fingers so our learned behaviors could be removed. The result would be like suffering a form of amnesia, with this essential component unrecognizable: What we really, truly believe. But God, He is very aware of the purpose and potential He has placed in us, and He is very willing to birth new Life within us!
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If your interest has been peaked, I pray you consider taking part in these lessons and receive whatever God is waiting to impart. Each lesson has the title given to it by Pastor John Baker, so steps can be taken, twelve, that will take us further than we could have hoped or imagined. Like Jacob who wrestled with the Angel of the Lord, and afterwards received the new name Israel, which represents his change of character; we too can experience miraculous changes when the strength and power of God’s Word is known.
Yes! These steps have been established so we can walk into realms of understanding with Holy Spirit as our Guide, as we set off on this journey of Renewal (Inner Healing) and Recovery. There are principles Pastor Rick Warren established, eight in all, that will provide support and protection, as spiritual guardrails, during this process of our becoming more God-dependent rather than codependent. For then, we can truly experience what it means to celebrate Renewal, to Celebrate Recovery, to celebrate friendship with God, Who seats us in heavenly realms (Ephesians 2:6) and does immeasurably more for us than what we could ever think or ask (Ephesians 3:20).
The first key is to maintain an honest view of the spiritual reality God want us to know. Begin by not only considering circumstances and events as substantial, but by becoming aware of the substance of Truth – the Life, the Alpha and Omega, the heart and spirit as we work on taking steps of faith remembering, proclaiming:
God exists and I matter to Him
That God could and would if He were sought
Admitting I am powerless
If God is your co-pilot, switch seats
Acknowledging in certain areas my life became unmanageable
Sorrow shared is halved; Joy shared is doubled
Believing God will restore me with Love, a Sound Mind and Power
Success means getting your BUT out of the way
Believing God will help me stay committed to this decision to put
All of who I am into His possession and safe keeping
There is no magic in this process of renewal and recovery only miracles
Believing the Word of God will encourage, support and strengthen me
As I make a searching and fearless moral inventory of myself
There is pain in this process. Misery is optional
Because of God’s loving-kindness I have become willing to admit to God,
To myself and another person the exact nature of my wrongs
The road to resentment is paved with expectation
With Truth as my solid foundation I have become entirely ready to have God
Remove all my defects of character
Courage is faith that has said its prayers
Having received faith and hope and love for the Surety God has given
I humbly ask Him to remove my shortcomings
F.A.I.T.H. = Fantastic Adventure In Trusting Him
Having gained knowledge and insight and understanding I have become willing
To make a list of anyone I have harmed, and to make an amends to them all
Just for today I will try to live through this day only,
And not tackle my whole life problems at once
Having gained confidence and trust in God’s refuge I have become willing to step out
With the mindset I am doing this with God and for His glory to make my amends
Whenever possible unless to do so would cause injury to others
Remembering nothing is going to happen today that you and God can’t handle
I embrace my covenant relationship with the Father, Son and Holy Spirit by continuing
To take a personal moral inventory, and when I am wrong being prompt to admit it
We are not human beings having spiritual experiences;
We are spiritual beings having human experiences
I invest in my relationship with God by communicating through prayer and meditation
To improve my conscious contact with Him seeking knowledge of His will
And the power of grace to carry that out
If God seems far away, who moved?
I seek Revival, Restoration and Reconciliation, a spiritual awakening, as a result of taking
steps to carry God’s message to others and to practice these principles in all my affairs –
Worry is a conversation you have with yourself about things you cannot change.
Prayer is conversation with God about things He can change!
Within each lesson information from the following sources has been included:
1. Co-Dependent No More Melody Beatty
2. Beyond Co-Dependency Melody Beatty
3. Codependents Guide to the Twelve Steps Melody Beatty
4. The Trauma Zone R. Dandridge Collins, PH.D
5. Breaking Free Pia Mellody & Andrea W. Miller
6. Celebrate Recovery Leader’s Guide John Baker
Denial is the first of 25 lessons incorporated into our journey of Renewal (Inner Healing) and Recovery, an undertaking that will make you ride high and soar above what disillusions and shames. You’ll be free to enjoy God (Isaiah 58:14 Message)! Honoring the Lord in what we do, not following our own desires and pleasures, not talking idly. Then the Lord will be our delight! He will see to it we each receive our full share of blessings as God’s will is being done to Refresh, Replenish and Revive – a spiritual Rebirth – as His purpose is given definition: Rebirth. The English Language Learners helps us to better understand:
1. The act or process of becoming healthy after an illness or injury; the act or process of
recovering INNER HEALING
2. The act or process of returning to a normal state after a period of difficulty
DELIVERANCE
3. The return of something that has been lost, stolen, etc.
SALVATION
- Denial has been defined as:
- A false system of beliefs that are not based on reality
- And A self-protecting behavior that keeps us from honestly facing the Truth
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The Psalms have been my prayers, and I asked: “Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting,” Psalm 139:23-2. For surely Lord, “You desire truth in the inner parts; therefore, teach me Your wisdom in the inmost place,” Psalm 51:6.
The Lord answered and sent me on this journey of inner healing and recovery, and it’s my pleasure to share the discoveries I have made with you. Within each section the amassed information emanates its own distinct findings and encouragement; however, when worked and melded together, like a kaleidoscope, they offer radiant portrayals of God’s love and concern for our overall well-being. For this quest is one designed with the support of God’s Word, which provides a solid foundation one not swayed by opinion or emotion for this sole purpose: Life changing breakthroughs would be experienced!
The Message Bible tells us not to shuffle along, eyes to the ground, absorbed with the things right in front of us. Look up, and be alert to what is going on around Christ (Colossians 3:2).
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Yes, the Son of God has come and offers us knowledge, insight and understanding, so that we may know Him Who is True (1 John 5:20a); Who said:
“I will make an everlasting covenant with them: I will never stop doing good to them, and I will inspire them to fear, to be in awe and wonder of Me, so that they will never turn away from Me. I will rejoice in doing them good with all My heart and soul. I will betroth you to me forever; I will betroth you in righteousness and justice, in love and compassion. I will betroth you in faithfulness and you will acknowledge the Lord.,”
Jeremiah 32:40.
This is God’s testimony: He gives us eternal life, and this life is in His Son (1 John 5:11). And this is eternal life: That they may know the Father, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, Whom He has sent (John 17:3).
Praise God! It took time but I received this Good News, and now I know that Jesus, God’s Word of Truth and Life and Grace, continues to walk on earth accomplishing the miraculous so we can open our eyes and see, open our mouths and taste how good God truly is (Psalm 34:8). The Lord doesn’t leave us lame, He becomes our Righteousness making us upright, putting us in right standing with God (1 Corinthians 1:30), for He desires the upright to see His face (Psalm 11:7), and share in His glory (2 Thessalonians 2:14). This is why He says:
“Come now, let us reason together.”
Are you aware of the exchanges God was able to make for you through His Son?
- Jesus was condemned that you might be forgiven
- Jesus was wounded that you might be healed
- Jesus was made sin for your sinfulness, that you might be made upright by His
righteousness - Jesus tasted death for you that you might receive everlasting life
- Jesus was made a curse that you might receive an abundance of blessings
- Jesus endured poverty that you might prosper and be in health even as your soul
prospers - Jesus bore your shame that you might receive His glory
- Jesus endured rejection that you might know God’s acceptance
- Jesus was cut off that you might be united with your heavenly Father
- Jesus laid His life down so you could be made alive in Him
This is why I have prayed over this outreach – For God, Fore His Glory – that it would be as a beacon that signals safe refuge in the arms of Jesus, while holding out to all – the Word of Life (Philippians 2:15 TLB); which is a Beacon for sound advice; a Light that emanates good teaching; a Life path of moral and corrective discipline (Proverbs 6:23).
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There is much that has been lost, given away and taken from us. This time is God-given for you to recover from the abuse and trouble and harsh (codependent) servitude you have endured (Isaiah 14:3 The Message). This time is God-given for you to discover tools, keys and truths that will work to free you from the chains of injustice and the cords of that yoke (cruel and abusive exploitations of this world). To set free those who are oppressed (dominated, coerced, belittled, demeaned); and break every yoke (anger, hatred, prejudice, lust, greed…). (Isaiah 58:6-9).
All that’s needed is a willingness to say Jesus:
“Here I am! I’d like to be Your friend.”
This is the God-given time to be edified so any falsehood in which you have been living can be identified, and those things weighing you down can be removed. Along this course of Renewal (Inner Healing) and Recovery, I saw myself walking down a very brightly lit white corridor, and as I navigated through each and every step, following principles, receiving what these lessons imparted, I saw myself setting things down – emotional baggage. Ridding myself of self-blame and shame and guilt. I was learning the difference between accountability and responsibility what was mine and what was not. I was learning to be patient, respectful and kind to myself, to take care of my side of the street, to live one day at a time.
There is a lot of information; however, remember to keep in mind this material is meant to work in your behalf to release you from character deficits and self-destructive behaviors that are harm-filled one step at a time; one day at time (a process). And, if assistance is needed for one moment, one hour at a time, God’s Word will always be there to support and empower. That you might recover cheerfulness and encouraging strength and know gladness (Psalm 39:13) and wonderful times of refreshment that God sends from heaven, the presence of the Lord
(Acts 3:19 TLB).
This information is life changing! For you will grow in knowledge and confidence knowing, trusting, believing – God loves you; and it is God Who will help you remain confident in His love for you as He helps you to apply what pertains to you and your life at this present time. God will help you reclaim your power from the likes of fear or anger or issues of control that we have empowered for such a long, long time. And what’s so very sad, the empowerment we provide the forces of negativity is being used to inflict harm against ourselves and others.
So I encourage you, no matter how simple or complex the circumstance you face – keep in mind there are only two choices – two directions in which to go. My prayer, my hope is you choose daily to continue on God’s mission of Renewal (Inner Healing) and Recovery. Come, travel its paths and find rest for your soul (Jeremiah 6:16). Discover God is a fountain of Truth (John 3:33). Discover His words and live, really live; body and soul, you’ll burst with health (Proverbs 4:22) as this discovery is made – Who you really are, and your place in God’s family (Matthew 5:9).
STEP FIVE
(WHILE SEEKING FRIENDSHIP WITH JESUS)
WE ADMITTED TO GOD, TO OURSELVES AND TO ANOTHER
HUMAN BEING THE EXACT NATURE OF OUR WRONGS
“Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray
For each other so that you may be healed,” James 5:16
PRINCIPLE FOUR
OPENLY EXAMINE AND CONFESS MY FAULTS
TO MYSELF, TO GOD AND TO SOMEONE I TRUST
“Happy are the pure in heart,” Matthew 5:8
LESSON THIRTEEN
ADMIT
- The wages of our sin is death
- The wages of sin can never be frozen
- Nor can they ever be subject to income taxes
- One of the main reasons for that
- Most of the wages of sin go unreported
- If the wages of sin is death
- Shouldn’t you quit before payday
- Shouldn’t you quit before payday
- If the wages of sin is death
- Most of the wages of sin go unreported
- Many of us have been keeping secrets
- Almost all of our lives
- The toll we pay is loss of
- Self-respect
- Energy
- Bondage to old codependent habits
- Admitting out loud those secrets
- Strips them of their power
- They lose much of their hold on us
- When they are spoken
- We are afraid to reveal our secrets to another person
- Even someone we trust
- We somehow feel like we have everything to lose
- Nothing to gain
- Do you know what we really have to lose by telling
- Our secrets
- Our sins to another
- We lose our sense of isolation
- Our sense of aloneness will begin to vanish
- Our sense of aloneness will begin to vanish
- We will begin to lose our unwillingness to forgive
- When people accept and forgive us
- We start to see
- We can forgive others
- We can forgive others
- We start to see
- When people accept and forgive us
- We will lose our inflated, false pride
- We see and accept who we are
- We begin to gain true humility
- Which involves seeing ourselves as we really are
- Seeing God as He really is
- We lose that harsh judgmental and critical attitude
- We gain a more compassionate approach with ourselves and others
- We begin to recognize and acknowledge
- Our survival behaviors have been as bad
- Maybe even worse than those we judged and condemned in others
- We will lose our sense of denial
- Beng truthful with another person will tear away our denial
- Beng truthful with another person will tear away our denial
- STEP FIVE:
- Admitted to
- God
- Ourselves
- Another human being
- The exact nature of our wrongs
- “The exact nature of our wrongs”
- How we’ve offended other people’s boundaries
- You’ve described the exact nature of your wrongs in the lists you have
written for Step Four about- Disregarding the boundaries of adults and children in your life
- You say out loud in the presence of another human being:
- “This is what I did to violate your boundaries”
- As you do this step, talk about what happened, and every time you notice an
emotion, no matter what you are saying at the moment- Stop to name the emotion
- Allow yourself to experience the feelings
- You might simply say:
- “I’m feeling really sad about this”
- “I’m feeling really sad about this”
- There are three benefits to be gained when we admit our wrongs
to another:
- WE GAIN HEALING
- Since the Bible promises
“CONFESS YOUR SINS TO ONE ANOTHER AND YOU WILL BE FORGIVEN”
James 5:16
- The key word is HEALED
- God forgave you when you confessed your sins to another
- Now He says you will begin the healing process when
2. WE GAIN FREEDOM
- Our secrets have kept us in chains
- Bound
- Frozen
- Unable to move forward in any of our relationships
with God and others- Admitting our sins snaps the chains
- God’s healing power can start
- Admitting our sins snaps the chains
“Thy cried to the Lord in their troubles, and He rescued them!
He led them from the darkness and the shadow of death,
And snapped their chains”
Psalm 107:13-14
- Unconfessed sin will FESTER
“When I did not confess my sins, I was worn out from crying
All day long…My strength was completely drained”
Psalm 32:3-4
- Openness is to wholeness
- As secrets are to sickness
- Admit
- TURN from your sins
- Remember, the only sin God can’t forgive
- The one that is not confessed
3. WE GAIN SUPPORT
- When you share your inventory with another person
- You get support
- Our supporters can keep us focused, and provide positive feedback
- When your old friend “Denial” surfaces
- You hear Satan’s list of excuses
- “It’s really not that bad”
- “They deserved it”
- “It really wasn’t my fault”
- You hear Satan’s list of excuses
- Your support person can be there to challenge you
- With the Truth
- You just need someone to listen
- While working this step, we will learn to
- Reach out to others
- Be vulnerable
- Say whatever it is we need to say
- Admit to ourselves whatever it is we need to ACCEPT
- Because we trap ourselves in ourselves
- While working this step, we talk to someone we trust about those things
- We really don’t want to talk about
- We need to get it out
- Into the Light
- To be set free
- Into the Light
- While working this step, we try hard to stay honest we all have
- Fears
- Limiting beliefs
- Resentments due to the mistakes we have made and the Judgment
calls we have made during times in our lives- When we were afraid
- Trying to survive
- When we were afraid
- Sometimes we’ve manipulated
- Even crossed the line into dishonesty
- We have violated our own moral code, using the tools of Denial
- Rationalizing
- Accusing
- Justifying,
- Minimizing…
- So we can tuck the guilt away
- All the feelings that go with it
- Deep inside
- Ultimately giving us a new list of
- Fears
- Shame
- Ultimately giving us a new list of
- Deep inside
- While working this step, we inventory ourselves searching out
- Fears
- Beliefs
- What we have done wrong
- Taking responsibility for our part
- Telling someone
- Following the guidance we receive
- So appropriate amends can be made
- So we can be set free from the incident
- The gift of these steps is
- Healing
- Self-acceptance
- The development of a bond with
- Others
- Ourselves
- God
- A bond that will help us heal and overcome the past hurts of trauma
- As you learn to walk in Truth (3 John 3)
- You will be moving toward
- Peace
- Contentment
- Away from the unnerving after-effects of trauma
- Flashbacks
- Nightmares
- Intrusive thoughts
- You will be moving toward
- Since trauma can’t tell time those unwanted flashbacks take
you back to that- Place of pain
- This is because emotional trauma is such a formidable foe
- Sometimes it seems to chase you
- Even in your sleep
- There is good news
- You can learn from your dreams
NIGHTMARES ARE A GIFT
- Nightmares suggest
- You are ready to bring to the surface a problem you’ve been
- Avoiding
- You are ready to bring to the surface a problem you’ve been
- When you
- Face the nightmare
- Wrestle with the painful memories that trouble you most
- You will overcome them
- Like Jacob, we too can get our blessing
- If we are willing to persevere and wrestle with the issues that
previously overwhelmed us
- If we are willing to persevere and wrestle with the issues that
- Jacob’s name change to Israel represented a CHANGE OF CHARACTER
- Trauma victims also need some changes to happen so they can move
- From victim to OVERCOMER
- Nightmares replay traumatic events to
- Help us master them
- Here are a few interpretive examples:
- A person falling may suggest the need for support that you feel
you are not receiving - Taking an exam but not being prepared may suggest some area
of your life where you feel insecure and need better preparation - Fighting with a person or animal may suggest that there are issues
you have been battling that need to be resolved/reconciled - Being chased may suggest that there are important issues or people
that you need to face - Driving out of control and not being able to brake may suggest that
there are areas in your life that appear to be out control. It would be
beneficial to relax and find a more balanced approach so that you can
“enjoy the ride” - Running stuck in slow motion and being unable to yell may suggest
that you are stuck in some area of your life and need to speak out and
give your concerns a voice
- A person falling may suggest the need for support that you feel
- Nightmares have the impact of keeping past pain alive by
- Downloading it into your dreams
- Nightmares are difficult to master
- They generate so much fear
- What you need to remember
- Nightmares are just DREAMS
- What you need to remember
- They generate so much fear
- Dreams are messages from the unconscious to your waking self
- Dreams CANNOT hurt you
- They are ideas, wrapped up in a dramatic story that plays in your
mind while you are asleep
- The key is to
- Understand
- Decipher those messages
- When you can do this
- You stop being afraid of your dreams
- You use them as a springboard for PROGRESS
- The Word of God offers you the support you need by keeping your
focus on the- Hope
- Encouragement
- Inner Healing Truth offers
“Beloved, I pray that in ALL things you may prosper
And be in health, just as your soul prospers”
3 John 2
Dear Lord, with Your help I know I can face all things, even my nightmares.
I understand that in the grand scheme of things my nightmares have a
Message for me that I need to master. I need to learn not to be overwhelmed by my fears.
I need to learn that if I run from my fears they will only hunt me down in my sleep.
Your Word teaches me that You have not given me a spirit of fear. So grant me, Lord,
A Spirit of Boldness that will allow me to face my fears wherever they choose
To pop up. Thank You for the assurance that as my fears
Lose their grip on my life, I will find restful sleep. Amen.
- Steps Four and Five are Cleansing, Freeing Steps
We made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves!
We admitted to God, to ourselves and to another human being
The exact nature of our wrongs!
- These steps are the tools we need to begin this process of healing and
restoring ourselves to- Sanity
- Peace
- Self-esteem
- Healthy relationships
- Intimacy with ourselves, others and God
- Working these steps will give us the help we need
- For healing from our past
- From old negative beliefs
- From repressed feelings
- From mistakes
- From all that we are striving to be healed from
- While working these steps, we look within with an attitude of
- Compassion
- Self-responsibility
- Making every attempt to do this without fear
- Working these steps requires us to use responsible thinking led by
- Healthy boundaries
- Guidance of Divine Wisdom
- This Fifth Step, admitting the exact nature of our wrongs, gives us
permission:- To be who we are
- To forgive and respect ourselves
- To forgive and respect others
- To discover and use the tools we need to establish a lifestyle
of self-care in relationships- As we look within and are working to be honest
- With ourselves
- God
- Others
- As we look within and are working to be honest
- This Fifth Step ultimately gives us permission:
- To have emotions
- To be human
- To be genuine
- Vulnerable
- Transparent
- The Fifth Step is the Telling-The-Truth Step, which will set us free,
as we work to take responsibility:- For our feelings
- Needs
- Wants
- For our part
- Even when our part means removing ourselves from
the victimizing behaviors of another
- Even when our part means removing ourselves from
- To have compassion
- For ourselves when we speak
- For the other person as much as possible
- For what we need to say
- For speaking our truth
- Taking RESPONSIBILITY is the one way we remove
ourselves as victims
- Taking RESPONSIBILITY is the one way we remove
- Again, many of us have been keeping secrets
- Almost all of our lives
- The toll we pay is loss of
- Self-respect
- Energy
- Bondage to old codependent habits
- Many of us:
- Push our thoughts and feelings out of our awareness
- Because of fear and guilt
- We have become afraid to let ourselves be who we are
- We may appear rigid and controlled
- Push our thoughts and feelings out of our awareness
- We tend to:
- Feel terribly anxious about problems and people
- Worry about the silliest things
- Think and talk a lot about other people
- Lose sleep over problems or other people’s behavior
- Worry
- Never find answers
- Check on people
- Try to catch people in acts of misbehavior
- Feel unable to quit talking, thinking and worrying about
other people and problems - Abandon our routine because we are so upset about
somebody or something - Focus all our energy on other people and problems
- Wonder why we never have any energy
- Wonder why we can’t get things done
“Listen to my prayer, O God, do not ignore my plea;
Hear me and answer me. My thoughts trouble me, and I am distraught
But I call to God, and the Lord saves me.
Cast your cares on the Lord, and He will sustain you;
He will never let the righteous fall”
Psalm 55:1-2,16,22